Category Archives: behind the scenes

Blinding Spotlight

For years I had emceed this particular event for free. They had little budgets and I was happy to help out. The last time I emceed the event the lighting technician manning the spotlight caused me grief. All went well in rehearsal. In one part, a crucial part, I announced the debutants as they came to the stage with their partners. Most of the evening had gone well until one part where all house lights went down and only a spot light remained. The spotlight was on me.

I tried to face the audience and read the names on the script at the same time. The spotlight was like a flame thrower.

It was so bright I could not see too well. As it was held in an ex serviceman’s club, I can only assume that the spotlight may have once been used to spot energy aircraft miles away. And now, it’s living out the rest of its life in the Ingleburn RSL function room.

No Recovery

Even with my rapid blinking and squinting my eyes could not recover and my poor eyes felt if they were about to burst. There were halo effects and splotches as I tried to read the page. Odd images covered the page as I read words incorrectly. The audience watched. I asked the spotlight man to turn his spotlight down. He was confused. It was a spotlight to illuminate the emcee–and that’s what he was doing. I managed to finish with quite a few mistakes and the evening wore on. I asked a second time. No change. I battled on and made a few mistakes as the writing was very hard to see. My eyes were creating their colours.

The Organiser from Hell

At the end of the night I invited the organiser to the stage (this was written on the run sheet). She took the microphone from me and thanked everyone for their efforts. Except me. Off stage and as I was about to leave she abused me for introducing an elder incorrectly. I explained I was blinded by the spotlight and could not read the names correctly. She walked away.

The next year they asked me to emcee again. I declined. They kept calling…

There are moments in emceeing where the organiser doesn’t understand the difficulties. The saddest part is when you are taken for granted. Of the many hundreds of events I have emceed I have never had trouble with a spotlight except for this one time.

A Flustered Stage Manager

You’re on stage facing the audience you thank the previous act for their wonderful performance and then lead into introducing the next act – a dance troupe. You build them up, as per your script and just as you raise your voice to say them name comes a whisper. Actually not a whisper, more a cry of desperation from the stage manage.

“Pssst. Pssst. Psst.”

A thousand people are watching me as I stop mid sentence.

“Excuse me ladies and gentle I think I am being summoned from beyond.

Off stage, the stage manager gave a cry for help. “Please give us ten minutes!”.

I was not in any position to say no. So ad lib it was.

“Ladies and gentlemen…a slight delay…we’re not talking a one minute delay or two but ten. It appears our dancers, from lands afar, are putting the final rehearsal on a new dance to show us. Yes, we’ll give them ten minutes. So instead of you just waiting spellbound let’s find out who has been to ‘xyz’ country – the place where our next dancers originate.”

Proud hands reached for the sky as I called a few to the stage and interviewed them about what they liked about that country and then asking what we should visit when we go there. They knew there topic so it was an easy ten minutes.

I have never forgotten that poor stage manager first with her look of desperation and last with a grin of relief.

Psst…Psst.

“We’re ready…”

As an emcee prepare for the best but expect the worst.

No Shirt Madness

As I stood on the stage in front of a few thousand people at a Thai cultural event in Parramatta, my mind was not right. I was wearing a t-shirt. Not a good look for an emcee.

I was told someone would deliver a traditional Thai shirt on the day. That event is my worst case of feeling I had let the audience down. A few weeks prior I met with the official Thai team in Sydney and everything was finalised on this huge event to showcase the Land of Smiles. The day would come with dancers, performers and cooking demonstrations, speeches and fun. The organisers went out of their way to make sure it would be a memorable event. At the next rundown meeting a few days before they suggested the officer suggested I might look smart if I wore a traditional Thai shirt comprising of a long sleeved white shirt and no collar. A member of the team mentioned she had such a shirt and would bring it along for me. All was set for a great day.

A No Show

I arrived one hour before wearing a white t-shirt expecting the shirt would be there for me. It was not. The lady was late. I waited. My home was an hour away and no time to rush home for an emergency shirt. I waited. She arrived with no shirt sharing that she had delegated that responsibility to another. The another didn’t turn up. I was frantic and needed a solution. My immediate thought was to run. I felt I had let down the side.

Painful Solution on the Day

I talked to the dancing instructor about my plight. She found a gold sabai sash I could add. Normally this is draped over the shoulder when you wear traditional dress. A white t-shirt is not traditional dress. As the audience were mostly Australian perhaps they wouldn’t notice. Maybe they didn’t but I was most uncomfortable and felt I had done a disservice to the Thai organisers and the audience for this one person’s mistake. I learned a lot that day.

What would I do differently today?

These days I make my responsible for my own attire. I’d certainly phone the person concerned before the day to ensure the item is coming. I would also have a backup shirt ironed and waiting in my car. Or I would take delivery of the said item before the day. If it’s to be it’s up to me.

The Faulty Technician

An audience of senior year students filled the club’s auditorium. My job as emcee was call out the finalists, bring them to the stage and then announce 3rd, 2nd and then the winner. The event was highly charged and exciting as the students came from a performing arts high school.

Check Before

When I’m on stage I am responsible. The audience is watching me. I always remind myself that each job I do is an audition for the next job (you never know who is watching.) On this night I went through the whole script with the organiser and then got a teacher to help me with the pronunciation of some surnames. I never let anyone else write their phonetics for me – from experience I know to write my own phonetics. Memory will work.

The Technician

I went up to the control box at the back of the room and met the technician. I wanted to go over a few things. He was agitated at me asking ‘dumb’ questions. I would prefer to look dumb to technician than appear dumb in front of seven hundred people at the event. I asked to go over the slides with him so I knew the timing and projection of the finalist’s names onto the screen. He got more agitated. But I persisted. He kept telling me not to undermine his ability. I found this odd as most technician are pretty good.

The Disaster

All went pretty well. Then halfway through the night he brought up the names of the all the winners to the screen. The night of anticipation was ruined as, for some reason, he showed the final slide. Every person in the audience was robbed of the joy of anticipation. I wanted to destroy that technician on my microphone but instead I just asked for that slide to be taken down but it stayed up for about fifteen seconds.

Expect the Unexpected

I tried to salvage the wreck he created. I joked with the audience that somehow a test slide got in the mix. Then apologised and left a question for the audience: “I wonder if that was the real slide or the test slide? Were they really the winners or not?” At least it left a bit of anticipation in the room.

The Aftermath

The technician was a full time employee at that club but he didn’t last much longer as he had stepped on too many toes. Sometimes with all the planning in the world, the unexpected happens. The teachers, the school and the students worked very hard to make it a memorable night. Even though I checked everything to make sure the night flowed there were obstacles. On the spot thinking can help save the day by brining things back to a positive…sometimes…